Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
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