I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I currently don't understand fingers.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
