Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
