thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
