Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
