i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
