I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
