This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize