remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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