we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
