that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
