I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
