Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
