Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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