Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
