i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
