Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
