Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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