it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
