Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
My bed smells like the plague
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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