Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
