Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
