I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
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