just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
