To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
