please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Screwed.edu
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
True college students do jello shots in the library
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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