I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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