I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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