i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
