But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
