are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
