You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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