so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
