He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
