...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Randomize
