he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
