omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
