I understand Curling. That high.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize