yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
