hotel room ftw
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
