Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
