Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Panties = found
Randomize
