U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Randomize
