Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize