anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
