Buhtt sex?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize