When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
