idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
