it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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