I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
