I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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